The following things must be remembered: I have no intention of committing suicide. I do not want to die in the near future ; read: within the next five years. I still intend to go back to school and finish what I have started. I must be realistic and understand that death, while morbid and unexpected, is inevitable.

Everyone dies. Everyone will die. The most I could do about it right now is be prepared. There should be a plan for these things. You could say I should write a will, but the reading of the will only comes AFTER the funeral. So it defeats the purpose.

Here are a few additions and maybe minor updates. The following people are the only ones allowed to push my coffin:

1. Alexandra
2. Yuri
3. Victoria Nastassa
4. Joy Camille
5. Elaine
6. Abraham Eleazar (if he so desires, if he will refuse to do this, then he is not allowed to attend my funeral or even wake)

Everyone must dress sexy and nice during my wake. I would like to imagine it like a scene from an old glamorous 1960s movie, or something similarly sophisticated. Still, men should come with NO hair product and with some facial hair.

Still, drinks, drinks must be served.

And this shall be one of the photos I want to be put on my coffin (maybe the main photo):

photo by Jonathan Cayaon, taken in Sagada

Some people call the photo on top of the coffin as pang-ibabaw. I want this to be mine, as I think it makes me look happy, it makes me look young, it can be ageless. Which most pang-ibabaws should be. God forbid I have a photo of myself in an office party being all drunk and reckless as my funeral photo*.

Okay, enough morbid thoughts for today. There will be three masquerade ball/costume parties for work, work, work. I need to invite events planners and events stylists and organizers maybe some bloggers for the events. I have written down some of them and had grouped them. I shall be sending them wonderful  invitations soon. Maybe this coming week.

*I edited this photo using those lovely Kubota actions. Lovely, but very expensive. Maybe I'll wear lipstick soon.

It must be noted that I do not intend to die in the near future, nor do I harbor any plans of suicide and freak accidents. I do not want to be morbid about this.

On the train home, I wonder how many people will die within the year. How many of them will die of unnatural causes like freak accidents and crimes; how many people in earphones; how many of them will leave behind a lover too devastated that they would cry in bed for days; how many of them would have “Hindi Kita Malilimutan” in their funeral march.

I would hate it terribly, in my grave, if songs like Hindi Kita Malilimutan and The Warrior is a Child would play in my funeral march. I would hate it more if my facebook friends would continue to invite me to “Become a Fan” of this and that or would invite me to try the newest craze in Facebook game application. In the untimely event of my death, knock on wood, I would like the following things to be done:

Here are the songs to be played in my funeral march:

1. The Magnetic Fields – Asleep and Dreaming
2. Chungking – Following
3. Stars – Take Me to the Riot
4. Lamb – Gorecki
5. This Will Destroy You – Threads
6. Dave Matthews Band – Oh

There are many other songs I want to be played in my wake. I will think about that next time. I do not mind which order the songs will be played. So as long as Asleep and Dreaming is the first one.

I’ve seen you laugh at nothing at all
I’ve seen you sadly weeping
The sweetest thing I ever saw
Was you asleep and dreaming

Now, down to the other nitty-gritties:

• I want my Facebook wall disabled. I do not want anybody to be posting “I miss you, lots” messages on my wall. It is futile, anyway. Unless you want me to go liking your facebook status when I am dead, then somebody needs to disable that Facebook Wall.
• If it is possible, I want all the males to attend my wake and funeral NOT cleanly shaven. I want them with all the facial hair that could possibly grow on their face.
• I want all the females to dress sexy at my wake and funeral. Refer to Smog’s Dress Sexy at my Funeral for this.
• Refer to Smog’s Dress Sexy at my Funeral for instructions on what to say during the part where you say a few words before the crowd.
• There must, and should be, alcohol. Everyone must drink at least a shot of gin or vodka. It will be a sort of tribute to that little lady in that box. Here’s to you, Kathrina. Bottoms Up.
• Only people who I have been in the houses of, and had been to my house, can push and walk beside my coffin. Alexandra can see to this, with the exception of Elaine she can be there.
• If I have any salvageable organ, please donate that. and CREMATION! Cremation.
• Photos! There must be photos! Of everybody!
• No texting beside my coffin. No tweeting beside my coffin. No email-ing beside my coffin. Do not take calls within 5 meters of my coffin.
• Scrabble, Risk, Monopoly, Game of the Generals, Chess, etc can be played during my funeral. Card games, uhm, no. Mahjong is allowable if you are people from the Debate Society, especially with Joy Camille Gomez and Abel Quintos.
• Somebody needs to ask the office where I work, or the houses where I stay or places I might have been in the last week to keep their doors open for a few hours, I might wanna drop by and visit them. I am a ghost, I do not want to deal with the business of opening doors or passing through walls.
• Somebody needs to put a notice in my blog, assuming that I still blog then, about my death. “In Memory of Diana Kathrina Leomo.” Somebody needs to disable my Flickr, Twitter and other internet accounts within a year after my death. I think I have some 70+. To the person who will be tasked to do this, I am sorry.
• Alex, please write my epitaph.
• Hello Panda, Jamaican Patties, Orange Juice, Tacos, Milk Tea, Kwek kwek, etc are things I want to see in my wake.Masarap kasi sila.
• Please miss me when I die.

I will have to think about my Death Contingency Plan some more. For now, work! Lyrids Meteor Shower is this week! We have a program, free-flowing chocolate milk and cookies for 150Php. Come by.