We too have feared loneliness

8 February 2012 by DK | 0 comments

Watching Vito Acconci’s Theme Song at 5 in the morning. Two years ago, I would have felt crippled at every thing this stranger is saying to me because I am thinking many of the things he is saying while sitting across someone I may have really liked two, three, four years ago.

There is a part of me that feels assaulted or awkward at the thought that there is a stranger telling me my feelings from years ago–the way he is telling me this.  The video is 33 minutes long, a man talking to me intimately I do not know at this point whether I should feel scared or surprised at how honest he is.

I cannot see your face. Of course I can’t see your face. You could be anybody out there. There’s gotta be somebody.

I realized, and openly accept, that sometimes I write as a form of a personal ad, a call to a stranger to take me on a train ride somewhere. At this point, I am glad that I am not looking for anyone anymore and that I am very happy with Noel.

I am just comforted by the idea that looking for love was in fashion as it was in the 1970s as it is until now. That desire is as compelling and raw and similar–no matter what year or context of loneliness.

I need someone to remember me, someone to take care of me- you can do that, come on.