Do not ever believe it, when they tell you–after a break-up–that there are millions of fish in the sea. Let me do the math.

“Marami pang iba diyan.”

This is one of the first few things you will hear after a break-up. Consoling friends or relatives would tell you that out there is a world of possibilities, that there are a million fish in the sea. You, however, know that this is not true. You know, based on preference, that while there are 47+ million Filipino males you would not like all of them, nor would you even date half of them.

I have been single for more than two years now. Not that there was a lack of candidates, nor that I have not been looking. Preference will prove to you that while there are millions of fish in the sea, half of them would be uninteresting for you.

There are approximately 47, 263, 600 males in the country today. I obviously could not date all of them, as I would refuse to date those who are too young and those who are too old. There are 3,053,616 males in the country today who are in the bracket of what I find eligible: 25-29 year old males.

I refuse to date males who do not know how to read or write, on top of this, I will vehemently refuse to date someone who can not do basic math. Functional literacy, or that which calculates the basic numeracy and calculation skills, in the country is at 84%.

3 053 616 * (84%) = 2 565 037.44 (rounded-off to 2 565 037, preferred because of age + functional literacy)

I refuse to date unemployed guys, or guys who refuse to look for work. This is not an Eagles’ song, love will not keep us alive. As I type this, or based on NSO’s April 2010 statistic, only 92% of Filipinos are employed.

2 565 037 * (92%) = 2 359 834.04 (rounded-off to 2359834, preferred because of age + functional literacy + employment)

I need to point out that I also refuse to date people who fall under some specific religious denominations. I will also, this time vehemently, always and forever refuse to convert to their religious sect due to personal reasons. As they are religious fanatics whose aim includes increasing their flock. We will only prove to disagree on this, so to eliminate the possibility of a heartbreak, I will just refuse to date them in the first place.

The first religious sect which I refuse to date have 5% in the country, while the other has 2.3% in the country. This means that I will refuse to date 7.3% of the population.

2 359 834 – (7.3%) = 2 359 833.93 (rounded-off to 2359834, preferred because of age + functional literacy + employment + religion)

I also refuse to date married men, as I do not like to be a mistress, thank you. Imagine all the anguish I have to go through dating a married man. 34.7% of males in the 25-29 age bracket are said to be married, according to the NSO. Which means only 65.3% of the male population are eligible. (I do not have a statistic for those in serious relationships, but I would assume that those who are really meant to be will eventually head off for marriage thus including them in the statistic that I avoid.)

2 359 834 * (65.3%) = 1 540 971.6 (rounded-off to 1540972, preferred because of age + functional literacy + employment + religion + singlehood)

Let me be frank and realistic: I will refuse to date people if they are much, much poorer than I am. As I have told you before, this is not an Eagles’ song: When we’re hungry, no, love will NOT keep us alive. We need food and sustenance. Our dates will compose of me wanting beer, the occasional cupcakes, the occasional movie, dinners, etc. On top of this, we will need celphone credits because how the hell do you expect for us to talk or meet-up. I am sorry to disappoint you, I do not have telepathy. On this note: I would refuse to date you if you are in the D & E socio-economic strata. I want a relationship, not one where I am the one to pay for everything, everything, everything in the date. I have been there before, I refuse to be there again.

It is also very easy to assume that those belonging in the ABC social-economic class has at least one internet account, or at least one email address. I prefer men who would at the very least pay attention to me. How else will our supposed relationship work if he does not even read my blog whenever he gets the chance? I am his future wife/girlfriend and he needs to pay attention. People belonging to the ABC social-economic class would at least have an access to a computer with internet. Thus it is important for me for him to belong in these classes.

According to this article, only 7% of Filipinos live in the ABC class.

1 540 972 * (7%) = 107 868.04 (rounded-off to 107868, preferred because of age + functional literacy + employment + religion + singlehood + income class)

I have a particular preference for certain zodiac signs. I blame it on the experience. I do not like certain signs, Aquarius being the most obvious one, with Gemini coming in as close second. I have a preference for 6 signs of the zodiac. The other ones, I either just do not care for nor am I interested in. I am sorry, this is just the case. Because of this preference, it is very easy for me to eliminate half of the male population.

107 868 * (50%) = 53 934 (preferred because of age + functional literacy + employment + religion + singlehood + income class+zodiac sign)

It is safe for me to assume that males who are attracted to other males will refuse to have babies with me, because they would not find me attractive. According to statistics by Lagablab there are 804,280 males who have sex with other males (which I will assume are those who are openly gay to admit it in the survey). This means that there are 1.7% in the population who might be gay. This leaves 98.3% in the male population who are eligible.

53 934 * (98.3%) = 53 017.122 (rounded-off to 53 017, preferred because of age + functional literacy + employment + religion + singlehood + income class+zodiac sign+sexual preference)

Coming from all of these calculations, this assumes that I find only 53017 from the male population eligible–without me being too picky. These calculations does not include my preference for boys with crooked teeth and bad hair. This means that I would only consider to date 0.11% of the male population, or 53017 potentially compatible males, as they all fall under these calculations.

Let us assume that I intend to get married at 30, I have roughly 5 years to try and meet him. That means I need to meet 10 603.4 eligible males a year, or roughly 29.05 decent, eligible males daily. I should go hang out in the Ortigas Center or Makati or something in order for me to find “the right one” soon. Or you know, add roughly 30 guys a day in Facebook which fall in the categories above mentioned. I have 84 single male friends who are listed as single in my Facebook Friends List, I only like 10 of them, or will consider to date or have dated. Perhaps I should ask every single cute guy I encounter to add me in Facebook?

The odds are not disheartening. I believe in a thing called LOVE, and so should you.

(PS, if you think you might know where Mr. Right might be, please ask him to add me in twitter: http://twitter.com/yayDK, I kind of deleted my old twitter account–long story. )

Much respect to my friend, Luis, who had previously done a statistical analysis on soulmates. (Hindi ko alam pasintabi sa English, sorry.)

Footnotes and references:
http://census.gov.ph
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Demographics_of_the_Philippines
http://makuhari.wordpress.com/2007/08/13/3-ways-of-looking-at-the-income-distribution-of-the-philippines
http://lagablab.wordpress.com/2006/09/15/gay-statistics-in-the-philippines-by-consensus/