Take Me to the Riot

It is easy for any one to claim to have some ten resolutions, but it is borderline unrealistic to say that one can do it all. The thing with change, or resolutions for this matter, is that it can get so hard to try to break away from habits. Opinions of many experts (or those pretending to have some knowledge on the matter, like myself) would tell you that habits are easier to create than break.

I know full well that I have too many bad habits I might need to see a therapist. This, thus, makes it a lot harder for me to create resolutions.

This is why my priority resolution for 2012 is to Invest Wisely.

 

I spend too much time online. I spend too much money on food. I spend too much feelings on people and ideas. This is not too say that all of these are bad.  But tt is cliche; too much of one thing is bad.

I spend too much time online. 2011 Kathrina would spend at least an hour on Facebook, 4 hours on Twitter and another four hours surfing the internet for things which I do not even need. Things like stalking the blog of old flames, googling random people from my past, stalking an old acquaintance’s boyfriend. and so on. At some point, after all the profile hopping and status updates one can not help but feel either smug or unhappy with one’s self because of the comparison you have made with yourself and some of these people. I would be lying to myself if I say that when I check out, google, or look at other people’s profiles that I have not, at some point, assessed that person and compared him or her to myself. (Of course, the comparisons are at some varying degrees.) It’s unhealthy. Admit it, you do it, too.

Do I really need that? No. So at the beginning of the year, I made it a point to stop using Twitter and deactivate Facebook.  It’s Day 18 and I do not miss it.

18 days into the year, I do not find myself investing unnecessary feelings or time on Facebook or Twitter. This, in turn, does not cause me to unnecessarily invest extra feelings on things or other people.

I am not one to say that I have not thought about people/relationships/ideas from my past within the last 18 days, but at least I do not add to whatever feelings of hate/jealousy/envy/other negative feelings I had.

So far, so good. Kathrina – 1, Social Networks – 0.

I spend too much money on food. At this point in my life, I wish I have more savings in my bank account. I entered 2012 debt-free so I would like to maintain that and invest more of my money on savings or other smarter investments instead of buying milk tea five times weekly. When I am sad or depressed my first tendency is to comfort myself with food. I am convinced I have an oral fixation. 2011 had made my weight balloon from 92 to 105 in under ten months! (This is a big thing for me, of course.) So for 2012, I should spend less on unnecessary food expenses and instead save that money for other important things.

So far for 2012: Kath – 1; Milk Tea – 0.

I invest too much feelings on people, ideas and things which do not even deserve any of my time or feelings. Because really do I want to keep hating people I do not even remember the faces/last names of? No. Do I really need to the be too hard on myself for eating that burger which fell on the floor? No. Do I really need to hate myself for forgetting Chekhov’s gun? No. Do I really need to be telling you, the reader, about all my regrets from the last 5 years? No.

So, 2012, let’s do this.